they’re all dead.

At this very moment in time, I am being stared at by two deer, a big horn ram (nature!), a pheasant, and a bobcat, and I am not afraid. Not in the slightest. The reason being that they’re all dead.
I’m in my cousin Chad’s room, on his bed, at his parent’s house on Lake Texoma (Texas + Oklahoma = Texoma). Chad killed all the animals in this room. Twice. The first time he shot them, the second time he had them mounted. Now they guard the room from predators, and girls. Shelby, and Amanda are both too scared to come in the room because they’re afraid of the ram (the big horn). And rightfully so. Rams can be quite hostile towards humans, according to the National Geographic Channel and they’re pretty good at staring contests, according to Robert Goulet (sorry, I know… two jokes from the same SNL skit… but I couldn’t resist).

Chad’s house is the third, gargantuan, Texan house we’ve stayed in on this trip. One house was near a Sonic and a Johnny Carinos. Two houses were on lakes. And all three houses were quadruple the size of our house in California, and about $200,000 less.

I got a picture of my Granny shooting a rifle.

We’ve done a lot of ‘hick’ things on this trip. One day of the trip we ate watermelon with salt on it (which is a big deal in Texas), had a watermelon eating contest, a watermelon seed spitting contest, we shot at cans on a fence post, and we fed deer (supposedly so someone else could shoot them later). And that was all in one day. You don’t even want to know what other hick-ish things we’ve done.

Actually, mostly we’ve slept and eaten vegetables.

It never occurred to me that my mother’s family were health freaks. But they are. You go out on walks or bike rides twice a day. You eat half of your meal, and save the rest for later (but you NEVER eat it). You eat a light snack, like carrots, or peaches, or a pound of chocolate cake, and you only drink sugarless drinks, and 64 oz Diet Coke’s (ha!).

Now it’s time for bed.

I’m reading Breakfast of Champions by Kurt Vonnegut, and I think the Big Horn is making eyes at me.

Buenos noches! – that’s for the 53% hispanic population of Texas.

Good night! – that’s for the rest of you!

Sounds :: Sleeping Bear, Sault Saint Marie // Sufjan Stevens

written on saturday evening, the fourth (4th) of august 2007, from Denison, TX, at 10:40 pm.

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